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Gratitude

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I often forget how to be grateful about my life and everything that I have. Which i think becomes the reason why that I get angry and upset about the things that I don’t get. Which are often petty and what I would call ‘unfair’.

And today it hit me again when I went to pick up my mum from the hospital. Mum has been there for almost 3 weeks because she had a running fever due to the growing puss on her foot. So it’s almost common for her to be in and out of the hospital.

And so far we’ve been complaining and complaining about how bad mum’s attitude towards food and how she doesn’t care about what she eats, hence she keeps getting hospitalized. This is all her fault and she just won’t listen to anything we say or advice! I feel she is so selfish. It is so frustrating!!!

But today I got to know 2 other people who are in a worse condition than me. Or at least similar that I feel so sad about. And I’m sure they are feeling the same way. And i thought that at least my mum’s situation is not as bad as that.

Mum is warded together with 7 other patients in an 8 bedded ward. The interesting part to an 8 bedded ward is you get to see all kinds of patients and their families. So there was one interesting Chinese lady opposite mum who was the most noisiest. She is a very old lady and she can no longer move by herself. Even getting up from the bed requires assistance.

The lady apparently has a bad temper and attitude. As she has to be fed by the nurse, she would just spit out the rice or food in her mouth at the nurse or even grab the rice from the plate and throw it on the ground.

At other times, she spews forth vulgarities at everything and everyone when she can’t the attention of the doctors, nurses and even the visitors around. She’ll start tearing and crying in sadness. And then out comes the “kanina” and “cibais” as she curses at the nurse, visitors and daughter too! She continues this even at night disturbing the other patients.

Her daughter is having a hard time managing her as her mother says the same vulgarities to her and throws her tantrum. She visits very little because she has to work. One day when she came with her husband, and after lecturing her mother not to be rude and behave herself, her husband got ill! He had blood in his pee and had to be rushed to the medical side as well. With two people in her family now warded.

Later, mum told us that apparently the daughter is very stressed out. Now not only she has to take care of her mother, her husband too. While she has two brothers, none of them seems to be interested to help or care for the mother and its up to her to do it.

I have not met her personally but after that story, I wished I had and I could give her a hug! I felt that I am lucky that my mum is still able to walk, to do her own things, to cook and still strong enough to carry herself. That she is still not a total burden on me and my sisters. That it could have been worse for me and my sisters.

And that my friend is what I forget every day while I’m busy concentrating on how mum is such a naggy, gossipy and ungrateful mother.

So thank you God! That my mum is still strong and well despite everything. It could have been worse but it is something that everyone can cope. I pray that mum won’t turn out the way that old lady is and she would still be strong enough to take care of herself and her mind.

So… There’s always someone worst off than me and perhaps I should open my eyes more to these things to better appreciate my life. Once again….

Thank you! Thank you! Thank you! =)

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